Sometimes it sucks being a parent.
“I need a day off.”
You know when you’re feeling stressed and confused and you know you’re going to say too much or the wrong thing but you open up anyway because you want to be honest and it all backfires and then you feel even worse plus you’re mad at yourself for breaking your own code of silence by saying things people don’t understand or want to hear and then you can’t stop rambling on about it to yourself in your head and writing run on sentences?
Yeah…that just happened.
…and then I continue to text.
Because it wasn’t enough to torture just myself by ruminating and so I felt the need to share the scattered thoughts that ran the full gamut from “I love you” to “fuck you” and all the things in between and I frantically pounded them out on my keypad through anger and tears with the hope and meaning to explain and clarify but reaching no other end then to unequivocally confirm my emotional instability.
Just in case there was any doubt.
I’m having a real live giveaway here on One Valium at a Time!
No, your can’t win any anti-anxiety meds. You’ll have to get those the legal way.
What you can win is this amazing coffee mug from National Etching.
As you probably guessed by their name, they have more than just sassy mugs.
They do custom etching on glass and crystal for any occasion. You can even get special group pricing for your school, non-profit or community organization fundraisers.
This is me and my mug.
That’s my morning face.
This mug will not only hold my coffee, it will hold a special place in my heart forever.
It’s my very first blogging “paycheck”!
I earned it for featuring National Etching on my blog.
That’s right, I work for mugs (and any other free stuff anyone wants to give me).
You can get yourself one just like it,
or this one..
All you need to do is:
1- Leave a comment on my blog post or this post link on my Facebook page.
2- Head on over to National Etching on Facebook and “like” their page. Tell them I sent you and be sure to check out all their other amazing stuff on their website.
3- Check back right here Saturday October 25 2014 to see if you’re the winner.
Let me be random.
I talk about nonsense.
I like trivia.
Sometimes I need to be quiet, sometimes I need you to be.
I have quirks and habits.
If they don’t hurt you,
Let me keep them.
They’re mine, you have your own.
Let me and my coffee have our alone time.
It’s special to me.
I need transition time.
I like rain and night time. The moon, the stars, the calmness of the night air.
They help me think, and feel alive.
I slip into melancholy comfortably.
I get lost in poetry…and then find myself there.
I like old movies and good books and bad television shows.
I laugh a lot.
I cry more. I sigh…loudly and often.
I bite off more than I can chew.
My yes and no are followed by question marks,
or replaced with “I guess so” and “I don’t think so”.
My walls are high.
Don’t tear them down with brute force.
Look for the door,
And knock gently.
No hostile takeovers allowed.
I hate being pressured.
I’m an open book, but I’ll slam your fingers between the pages if you don’t respect my story.
I don’t have time for that.
I have issues.
No need for introductions, we’ve met.
I’ll send them on their way when I’m ready.
Don’t make anything about me more important to you than it is to me.
Walk away if you need to.
Stay if you like.
I’m tough, I’m strong.
I’m fragile and weak.
I need understanding and love,
Acceptance and comfort.
Lots of comfort.
I want relief from the pain.
Release from expectations that I can’t meet.
I’m under construction.
Wear your hardhat, and beware of falling rock.
I will let go of my mistakes…
And you, if you keep bringing them up.
When I push you away, don’t take it personally.
It’s me, not you.
Unless your being an asshole.
Check yourself before you call me crazy.
I have wide personal space boundaries.
If I let you cross that line,
You are special.
Even if you don’t feel it sometimes.
I’m angry and hurting and frustrated.
Let me feel my feelings.
In spite of the struggles I fight,
I give second chances,
More than once.
I trust until given a reason not to.
It’s a delicate thing.